Wednesday, August 22, 2012


                                                           Grandma Grace Barber 1920s
                                                        Kathleen and Grandma Grace 1956

Kathleen 1946

Grandmothers are remarkabke human beings.  They embody Spirits that are able to demonstrate 
unconditional love.   God made Grandmothers because in his Infinite Wisdom He knew that children needed someonoe on this Earth to love them in this way.  I had the most wonderful Grandmother.  I adored her and chose to spend as much time with her as I could.  She was often preferred over my Mother and Father.  Now you might think that had something to do with her spoiling me, but that was not the case.  She never had to ask me to do anythng more than once.  The love I felt in her presence was enough for me.  With her I felt whole, unflawed, perfect.  She nurtured me physically and mentally.  Her every wish was my command because in turn my every wish was her command.  We operated on a mutual admiration level, I could not imagine my life without her in it.  She was instrumental in building the foundation I have used to form the life I have today.  When she died in 
1956 just months after this picture was taken, the lights went out in my heart for a long, long time.  Even as a ten year old I wondered if I would ever be the same again.  But time passed and my heart healed bit by bit.  She was my first experience of loss.  She died in my bedroom on my Dad's Birthday.  I was never afraid in my room.  If anything I took solace in the fact that she had chosen that place to leave me.  I prayed for her, but mostly I prayed to her.  To this day I carry her Holy Card in my Meditation Book and thank her every morning for having been such a powerful influence in my life.  Her dying taught me not to be afraid of death.  I learned early on that death is part of life.
Most improtantly I learned that those we have loved never really leave us.  Instead they are indelibly stamped on the fabric of our being.  What they brought to us is a part of us.  

And now here it is sixty years later, and now I get to be one of those remarkable human beings....a
Grandmother.  I now understand the magic that my Grandma felt.  I felt it the moment I laid eyes on Evelyn four years ago.  Everytime I held her as a baby I whispered to her about all of her perfection and what she would someday accomplish.  I've prayed with her and played with her.  I've danced with her and imagined with her, all the while hoping that she is loving me much as I loved my Grandma.
I am working at making memories with her so that someday she will think of me and know that we shared an incredible time together.  When she is an adult I hope she will thank me for helping her to build a foundation that is solid and strong that she will continue to add to as the years pass. But I really hope she remembers the fun, the silliness and the laughter!

Until nest time....As alwaays, Kathleen 

Sunday, August 12, 2012


The summer is flying by. Actually I find this to be true of my life in general. There was something about loosing Tom that seemed to bring the events of simple everyday things into a much clearer and sharper focus. Instead of wishing time to pass I find myself immersed in the simple moments with a whole new appreciation. I no longer just say " I'm exactly where I am supposed to be", instead I KNOW that I am. I am aware of the gift of friendship. I value those currently in my life and I cherish the memories of those from my past. Do you realize the impact you have on each and every person you meet? Even the briefest encounter has a purpose. Your energy touching someone else's. Protons and neutrons bumping together and mixing, merging, and then as you separate some of you is left behind and some of them attaches to you and follows you into your day...your life. Have you ever thought about it like that? I do now.

August 12th
I've just spent twelve days at the cottage. It's been a great week. For the majority of the time I've been alone, but really when I'm here there is so much of my Tom here. This is the place we built so much of our relationship in. I'm not lonely when I'm here. The cottage is a gift he left me. I'm so grateful to
have this respite to come to. I feel restored after being here. Somehow these rooms, this space allows me to simply be.  Being is something I used to have a hard time doing ,  because DOING is what I always did best.

After twelve days I'm ready to go home. I know I can drive over here whenever I need to or whenever I want to.  But for now I'm restored, and just in time, Evelyn arrives on Thursday. I think she'll be bringing some of those protons and neutrons I was taking about and man, her's are full of energy and it's all positive!

Until next time....Always, Kathleen

Late Notes on Florida

                                                            Grandma and Evelyn Racing


                                                           Goodnight Grandpa


Now I know this is a late entry, but I wanted you to see some of the fun I had
When the Rices came to Naples.  As you can plainly see "my Evelyn" is no longer
a baby. She has mysteriously turned into a little girl. It's an example of that blink
of an eye that everyone talks about.

As soon as I retired, Tom immediately decided we'd start spending our winters
in Naples. I wasn't sure about it at all. Months away from my family and friends?
Off we went, starting yet another chapter in our lives. What did I find?  Well, a
beautiful city that I fell in love with, and friends.

More than anything Naples provided us with a place where Tom could stay active
in the winter months. It was safe. It was a haven as well, giving us distance from
a problem family member. But the best was having a place to share with friends and
family. Evelyn has had the oppurtunity to experience swimming, beaches and spend
quality time with both Tom and I. Tom loved having her with us. It wasn't long
enough, but it was, and thats what matters .

This is not my typical Blog. It's actually a test of sorts. It's my first iPad Blog.
If it really works, I hope to be back to blogging on a more regular basis.

Until next time.....Always, Kathleen